Integrity; What Does That Mean For You?

 Having a sense of integrity within myself is a commodity I have discovered to be of the highest order if I have any chance of experiencing genuine contentment, sturdy self worth, and most importantly, internal and external safety.

For me, living in integrity of self was once a hidden and buried concept.  I had lived so long out of integrity that once I’d gotten into drugs and the lifestyle that went along with that, I got really good at denying the fact that I was even out of alignment with my own integrity in the first place.

And I believe this happens a lot to Us all.

We all have addictions of some sort, question is; what it is we are currently addicted to?

Be it food, gossiping, a certain lifestyle, a certain feeling, electronics..

                                               *PSA- this is a judgement free zone*

We don’t gain anything by acknowledging what it is we have tendency to become addicted to, and then feeling guilty or shameful about it, Nope doesn’t work.

We gain Everything by acknowledging what it is we have tendency to grip onto and then sit with that awareness.

Literally once we become honest enough with ourselves to shine true awareness to the thing we are clinging/addicted to we begin the process of letting go.  I realize this sounds simple, and maybe even too simple yet it is undoubtedly the first step and key place to begin on the road to aligning with our own inner integrity.

Having fought various addictions thus far on my own journey I have come to find immense value on this step here of truth telling to self and bringing forth awareness first onto the gripping.  Once we have that realization and ‘Knowing’ then we get a chance to sit with that.  Feel what comes up.  Whether that’s fear, anxiety, panic, relief, anger, self abandonment, sadness..  We allow space to Feel It.  

Addictions serve us in some way believe it or not.  When we become addicted to something we are in a place of feeling vulnerable, overwhelmed, and misunderstood.  The addiction allows us a temporary escape from these emotions.  Once we bring awareness into the game we begin the process of releasing.  When we finally release the need to grip we can honor the act of the addiction itself for serving us and feel that gratitude as we move onto a healthier way of coping for us in the long run.

You may be thinking, ‘Why wouldn’t you just release the addiction as soon as you have awareness that you have it, especially if its obviously a harmful one?’

And that’s a great question, and the answer is yes! Yes there is many instances when we have the awareness and that is all that it takes.  We know its harmful to us and we start the detox process right away.  The detox process being a physical one, or being a pivoting process where we discover new modalities and new steps we can take to alleviate those fears, anxieties, and angers that brought us to the door of addictive behaviors to begin with.

Yet having gone through, and personally knowing many people that’s gone through this cycle of awareness and release it is apparent that there will be times that awareness is but the beginning.  It is the cornerstone of healing as well as the catalyst.  We See, we Know, we Feel, we Grieve, we Release.  This should allow us all a deep sigh of relief!  Often times during this process of seeing, knowing, feeling, and grieving, the chord that ties us to our addiction naturally becomes weaker and weaker until suddenly the day comes when the desire to be rid of the addiction is stronger then the desire to remain tethered.  

Allowing ourselves and others to set the pace of the process of our release of an addiction is absolutely vital because the more pressure, guilt, and shame we put onto ourselves to stop cold turkey, the tighter our tether may become due to self loathing.  And same goes by pressuring someone else.  Boundaries can certainly be drawn, but decisions can only be made from the sovereign self.

Becoming aligned with our own integrity means something different and looks somewhat different for each unique individual.  Our place is not to judge what’s best for another just as it doesn’t serve to judge what it ‘should’ look like for our own self.  This is a matter of the intuitive mind and the open heart.  When those two align and we have the feeling of Openness, Expansion, and Elation, we know we have found it, our destination of Integrity has been met and we now move forward with the road map of how to get back there if we ever lose our way once again.

After all, life’s all about the journey not the destination;

Enjoy the Ride,

With All My Love,

~ Britt ~